{"product_id":"the-funniest-things-ever-said-new-and-expanded-9781493041190","title":"The Funniest Things Ever Said, New and Expanded","description":"Here are1,237 laugh-out-loud quotes, quips, and jokes, all in one packed-to-the-brim volume. Yes, folks, sit back and enjoy this collection of inadvertent gaffes, thigh-slappers, puns, and everything and anything else that'll tickle your funny bone. There's something old, something new, something stolen, and something blue--from favorite comedians, sports and political figures, and literary wits. There are even giggles for the kids and groaners for the grown-ups. Just a few among the 1,237 funniest things ever said: \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\"I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.\"--Rita Rudner \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\"I don't know if it's good for baseball, but it sure beats the hell out of rooming with Phil Rizzuto.\"--Yogi Berra on being told that Joe DiMaggio was to marry Marilyn Monroe \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\"I made my money the old-fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.\"--Malcolm Forbes \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\"The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then, after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, 'You know what? Let's just grab lunch.'\"--Bill Maher\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eAbout the Author\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eSteven D. Price \u003c\/b\u003eis the author or editor of more than twenty-three books, including \u003ci\u003e1001 Dumbest Things Ever Said\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003eThe 1001 Smartest Things Ever Said\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003e1001 Insults, Put-Downs, \u0026amp; Comebacks\u003c\/i\u003e, and \u003ci\u003eThe Quotable Horse Lover\u003c\/i\u003e (all Lyons), as well as \u003ci\u003eThe Ultimate Fishing Guide\u003c\/i\u003e and \u003ci\u003eOld As the Hills: The Story of Bluegrass Music\u003c\/i\u003e. A resident of New York City, he is a keen observer of human achievement and folly.\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Lyons Press","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51807219908882,"sku":"9781493041190","price":11.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0831\/4771\/8930\/files\/img_5e65e8e8-c178-4a65-8bb1-c0db7d772466.jpg?v=1766045942","url":"https:\/\/surprise-castle.myshopify.com\/products\/the-funniest-things-ever-said-new-and-expanded-9781493041190","provider":"Surprise Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}