{"product_id":"the-cringle-academy-paranormal-why-choose-romance-9798587041356","title":"The Cringle Academy: Paranormal Why Choose Romance","description":"Ho! Ho! No!!\u003cbr\u003eStep One: Infiltrate Cringle Academy (which is filled with the snobbiest witches and wizards in existence, ugh)\u003cbr\u003eStep Two: Kidnap Santa\u003cbr\u003eStep Three: Win back my stolen crown\u003cbr\u003eStep Four: Take back Christmas \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eI'm the last Christmas elf and I'm freaking tired of that jolly, twinkle-eyed joke acting like he invented my holiday! I'm tired of witches and wizards turning Christmas into a corporation. And I'm absolutely over the whole elegant Christmas vibe these weirdos created. I mean pastels?! When did Christmas involve PASTELS! \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eI'm competing in this school's famous Christmas Cringle Competition. A week of everything Christmas--baking, snowball fights, gingerbread houses. Oh, I've so got this. \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eThere are a few things threatening to ruin my plans though: \u003cbr\u003eProfessor Jack Frost is winter itself. He's a powerful, ancient elf that could ruin my ruse if he gets too close and realizes who I really am.\u003cbr\u003eNick Krampus, the frightening Krampus monster who enjoys his job of punishing naughty people way too much. Yikes--is kidnapping Santa considered naughty?\u003cbr\u003ePyr Claus. Cringle Academy's little golden prince who I will in no way fall for. I don't care how good he looks or how everyone seems to buy his whole nice guy act. He's a Claus, enemy numero uno. \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eI'm pretty sure they know I've got Santa in my closet...I am so dead.\u003ci\u003e \u003c\/i\u003e\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Independently Published","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51985489690898,"sku":"9798587041356","price":12.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0831\/4771\/8930\/files\/img_9a3b906a-ac11-4337-bd51-a77ff2d41eb3.jpg?v=1769537615","url":"https:\/\/surprise-castle.myshopify.com\/products\/the-cringle-academy-paranormal-why-choose-romance-9798587041356","provider":"Surprise Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}