{"product_id":"resting-grinch-face-9798991962070","title":"Resting Grinch Face","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eI might not be able to ruin his life, but I will ruin his Christmas.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYeah, I'm totally a grinch. But I come by it honestly.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBecause of Oliver Frost, I flamed out of college in the most humiliating way possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNow I'm back in my small town-just in time to suffer through a display of small-town Christmas cheer so festive it will make you puke your eggnog. But who cares about being home for the holidays when you live with your family like a loser and have to share one bathroom with seven other people?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI plan to spend my Christmas purgatory being tsked at by elderly residents and passive aggressively prodded by my mom's friends about what I plan to do with my life.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI don't know, Deborah, work in the Christmas market and get screamed at by tourists because I didn't put enough sprinkles on their little brats' coffees? Seriously, who gives five-year-olds that much caffeine anyway?!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSee? Like I said. A grinch.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI hate Christmas.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI set a nativity scene on fire.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eGot in a fistfight with an elf-I lost, by the way.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd threw a vat of Snowman Surprise all over Oliver. Don't ask. Small-town Christmas insanity.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSleigh what? Oliver is here \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe man who humiliated me and ruined my life?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHo ho ho, fuck no.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe doesn't deserve a quaint small-town Christmas or a fancy Christmas tree from my family's farm.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe should be haunted like Ebenezer Scrooge by the Ghost of Christmas Past. Or at least the Ghost of Hookups Past.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMomma's gonna have herself a very merry Christmas revenge.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSwapping the salt and sugar so his Christmas cookies are ruined? Be still, my shriveled little heart.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSpying on him so I can gather recon to ruin his holidate? Damn, I forgot how ripped his chest was.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eSneaking down his chimney to steal all the presents under his tree? Amateur hour.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eUntil I get caught...\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eGuess I'm spending Christmas in jail.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBut when he sees I'm not wearing a bra under my ugly Christmas sweater, Oliver smiles like Santa has come early.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eCrap! I knew I should have worn my good underwear!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHold on to your stockings because the eggnog is spicy and mostly booze. This is a fuck-second-chances, Santa-stalker, holiday-revenge romantic comedy. Featuring Christmas-hating heroines with poor decision-making skills, ripped guys who will leave a very large package under your tree, and adorable corgis dressed up as reindeer, this standalone book has a happily ever after, guaranteed!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Adair Lakes","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51705281544466,"sku":"9798991962070","price":18.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0831\/4771\/8930\/files\/img_5613428d-3473-47a9-b9fe-dacf60294de6.jpg?v=1762345017","url":"https:\/\/surprise-castle.myshopify.com\/products\/resting-grinch-face-9798991962070","provider":"Surprise Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}