{"product_id":"ps-never-in-a-million-years-9798414596837","title":"P.S. Never in a Million Years","description":"\u003cp\u003eTo My New Boss\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou are an asshole. Maybe I'd even call you a boss hole. We've never even officially met because you're worried all of your lower assistants will \"fall for you and make a pass.\" You sent your executive assistant to give me a list of \"to-do's\" that were so basic I thought I was in preschool. And let's not talk about your \"never-do's.\" You can only wish I would make a pass. You would be so lucky as to even catch a glimpse of my fine ass. In fact, why don't you kiss it instead? Jerk.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAlso, I'm not taking a vocabulary or algebra test. Just because you're the CEO doesn't give you the right to be pompous and arrogant. And frankly, I saw that photo of you in the newspaper last year; are you cousins with the yeti? Not a good look.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYou can keep your $25 an hour. My self-respect is worth more than that. And no, I'm not interested in any of your other offers.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMarcia \"I have self-respect\" Lucas\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eP.S. Never in a Million Years\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'm not crazy-I never intended to actually send the email. It was just a draft email I wrote to vent. I needed the paycheck way too much to go off on my boss. Only when I went into the office the next day, there was a note on my desk. It read, \"Got your email. A million years is up. See me in my office. Your boss, Finn 'The Yeti' Winchester.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMy dad was right: my mouth would eventually get me into trouble. Only he had no idea just how bad the trouble was going to be.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Independently Published","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50864357015826,"sku":"9798414596837","price":11.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0831\/4771\/8930\/files\/img_a63e7934-7739-4ef8-8792-4353c02b53a5.jpg?v=1737654058","url":"https:\/\/surprise-castle.myshopify.com\/products\/ps-never-in-a-million-years-9798414596837","provider":"Surprise Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}