{"product_id":"portal-to-pleasure-9798345022115","title":"Portal to Pleasure","description":"\u003cp\u003eWhen my best friend sends me the screenshot of an article titled \"Female masturbation can apparently open a 'portal to hell'\", after the day I'd had, I'd jokingly replied with, \"Guess who's about to open ten thousand portals up in this bitch \"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI don't expect the universe to actually call my bluff, and have my first mind-blowing orgasm in years rip open a literal portal in my bathroom. Now there are three fantastical beings in my home, and I don't think they plan on leaving until they get what they want.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd what they apparently want is me.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Independently Published","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50900059029778,"sku":"9798345022115","price":6.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0831\/4771\/8930\/files\/img_74c66e65-58cc-4f4b-b780-88613830063a.jpg?v=1738374158","url":"https:\/\/surprise-castle.myshopify.com\/products\/portal-to-pleasure-9798345022115","provider":"Surprise Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}