{"product_id":"i-love-you-so-much-its-killing-us-both-9781593767600","title":"I Love You So Much It's Killing Us Both","description":"\u003cb\u003eSusan Choi's \u003ci\u003eTrust Exercise\u003c\/i\u003e meets Nick Hornby's \u003ci\u003eHigh Fidelity\u003c\/i\u003e in a Black woman's coming-of-age story, chronicling a life-changing friendship, the interplay between music fandom and identity, and the slipperiness of sanity\u003c\/b\u003e \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eSet in the suburbs of Los Angeles and New York City, \u003ci\u003e I Love You So Much It's Killing Us Both\u003c\/i\u003e is an immersive journey into the life and mind of Khaki Oliver, who's perennially trying to disappear into something: a codependent friendship, an ill-advised boyfriend, the punk scene, or simply, the ether. These days it's a meaningless job and a comfortingly empty apartment. Then, after a decade of estrangement, she receives a letter from her former best friend. Fiona's throwing a party for her newly adopted daughter and wants Khaki to join the celebration. \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eKhaki is equal parts terrified and tempted to reconnect. Their platonic love was confusing, all-consuming, and encouraged their worst impulses. While stalling her RSVP, Khaki starts crafting the perfect mixtape--revisiting memories of formative shows, failed romances, and the ups and downs of desire and denial--while weighing the risks and rewards of saying yes to Fiona again. \u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003eOne song at a time, from 1980s hardcore to 2010s emo, the shared and separate contours of each woman's mind come into focus. Will listening to the same old songs on repeat doom Khaki to a lonely life of arrested development? Or will hindsight help her regain her sense of self and pave a healthy path for the future, with or without Fiona?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eAbout the Author\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMariah Stovall has written fiction for the anthology \u003ci\u003eBlack Punk Now\u003c\/i\u003e, and for \u003ci\u003eNinth Letter, Vol 1. Brooklyn, Hobart\u003c\/i\u003e, the \u003ci\u003eMinola Review\u003c\/i\u003e, and \u003ci\u003eJoyland\u003c\/i\u003e; and nonfiction for The \u003ci\u003eLos Angeles Review of Books\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003eFull Stop\u003c\/i\u003e, Hanif Abdurraqib's \u003ci\u003e68to05\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003eThe Paris Review\u003c\/i\u003e, \u003ci\u003ePoets \u0026amp; Writers\u003c\/i\u003e, and \u003ci\u003eLitHub\u003c\/i\u003e. \u003ci\u003eI Love You So Much It's Killing Us Both\u003c\/i\u003e is her first novel and 24 Hour Revenge Therapy is her favorite Jawbreaker album. She lives in New Jersey.\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Soft Skull","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":50697100689682,"sku":"9781593767600","price":20.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0831\/4771\/8930\/files\/img_f595b2e7-c2e9-4ddc-8500-876f33086fe4.jpg?v=1744272434","url":"https:\/\/surprise-castle.myshopify.com\/products\/i-love-you-so-much-its-killing-us-both-9781593767600","provider":"Surprise Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}