{"product_id":"elf-against-the-wall-9798991962018","title":"Elf Against the Wall","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhen you kiss your perfect boyfriend under the mistletoe...only for your cousin to scream to the family that you stole her man, Christmas is OVER. \u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIn my defense, I didn't know my boss-yup, boss. Buckle up because this is messy-was my cousin's newly minted and totally lying fiancé. I thought he was the Nutcracker Prince come to finally show my family that I, too, was worthy of putting the star atop the Christmas tree.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI was so wrong.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNow my entire family thinks I'm a ho ho ho.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI'm at the top of the naughty list, not in a fun Elf on the Shelf way, but rather in a snide-comments-at-brunch and sitting-at-the-kids'-table kinda way.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI have to clear my name, or Christmas is ruined. Again.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhat better way than to blackmail my family's number one sworn enemy?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnderson Wynter is this desperate elf's last hope. Six-foot-five, ethically challenged, with washboard abs and a death wish, Anderson is the perfect weapon to expose my ex and help me get back in my family's good graces.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThat is, until the weapon massively backfires... and no, not like that.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnderson goes full Nightmare Before Christmas and shows up at my family's annual holiday party in nothing but tattoos and a motorcycle helmet and tells everyone we're dating.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYep, that kicks me off the naughty list and sends me straight to the Grinch's garbage dump.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNow I'm chained to a motorcycle-riding bad elf with terrible morals and an even worse attitude-one who sticks his hand down my shirt in the middle of my parents' posh country club and tells me to ride him like I do his bike.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWhen I slap him, he just smirks and asks if I fluff my marshmallows while fantasizing about betraying my family with him.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAs if.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNo way am I sleeping with the man my entire family hates.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBecause that won't just ruin Christmas.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt'll ruin the rest of my life.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e","brand":"Adair Lakes","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51705329582354,"sku":"9798991962018","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0831\/4771\/8930\/files\/img_566d258d-c607-495f-a3a7-fa876e0ff294.jpg?v=1762345705","url":"https:\/\/surprise-castle.myshopify.com\/products\/elf-against-the-wall-9798991962018","provider":"Surprise Castle","version":"1.0","type":"link"}